SATURDAY NIGHT from 9pm someone will die live on a webcam broadcast

YOU DECIDE:

[polldaddy poll=4775504]
broadcast hours
fri 9pm
sat 9pm
sun 9pm

I’ve been invited to speak at Oxford Universities HUMAN SCIENCES 40th anniversary SYMPOSIUM: Exploring the links between mental disorders and creativity in society.

I’m 2nd up of 3 speakers.
The other 2 are proffesors in Psychiatry and anthro…something.

so, at first glance, coming second…may see like a plum spot…the meat between the the bread. (the expression meat and two veg, also sprung to mind..but i quickly dismissed that as i believe it has strong sexual connotations..

prof1 and me and prof2

However i’m now looking on my position somewhat apprehensively now.

I feel a little bit like the labortory rat awaiting disection.

or rocky dennis in the film: Mask

We both have ginger hair

I might get mauled

me...

Infact my right and left flanks are always very vulnerable
and then i might even have to deal with questions

ATTACK SCENARIO

having said that I hear Oxford is very nice.

I’ve only been there once before.
and never masturbated there at all.

my website

WHO SHOULD DIE (part7) :GREGG WALLACE (off masterchef) HOW: Shoot close range WHY: Loud, fat, cunt.

Tax doesn’t have to be taxing says Moira Stewart on the advert.

me licking Moira Stewart out.

Being a freelancing nob, once a year i have to trail through my reciepts…and this year…behind the crumpled strips of paper….

Dinner for 2 receipt

In order for the next financial year to be just as interesting i’ve taken to buying women’s lingerie and condoms…so my tax return for next year, 2009/10 will tell just as interesting story.

womens stuff

Stories of blocked Motorways.
Images of Villages cut off.
Of treacherous conditions.
Abandoned Vehicles.
Of dying under frozen lakes.
Of councils road gritting issues.
Only travel if you have to.

Christ, Is snow really that……

Christ: “no….”

Bankers come in for a lot of shit these days…but i’ve realised how quickly investments can go wrong:

looking at ebay, i noticed someone was trying to sell a flyer from the recent show i was involved in.

i felt delirious…over joyed. Not only was it wonderous for a deflated ego….the finical benefits could be massive.

i’ve a whole pile of flyers i was to embarrased to give out….and here in front of me was a chance to not only clear them from below my bed, but get rid of the shed loads still left at the theatre. I could now begin to think about setting aside some money for a deposit.  (i’m not exactly sure what i need a deposit for yet though)

joy turned to pain however as i noticed at 99p no one had even bid. i tried bidding myself, to up my statue in the market place. However i forgot my password and failed the security.
LIFES A CUNT.

Prologue: although i have nothing to do with the watches on sale under my name, i would, fully endorse them, and personally consider them official merchandise along with this promotional video.

tonight is my last show…and its made me think..
a month ago i met and had my photo taken with Bill Hick’s mum at a screening of a film about the performer.

it made me think if anyone will want their photo taken of my mum when i go.
the actual logistics would be tricky as my mum doesnt get up to town that often and she runs a book circle on a monday.

so i’ve decided to bring out a poster of her and me with a whole cut in it to put your face instead of mine.
it will look a bit like this

it will retail at £5.99
it will be made of recyclable materials
proceeds will go to retards and famine victims.